Hypothetical situation: Your hair reaches your waist. Sweat dribbles down your forehead as you air guitar along to Iron Maiden’s “Number of the Beast.”  Suddenly, your Catholic mother bursts through the door. She begins to yell at you to turn down the music when she looks to the side and sees an upside down cross nailed to your wall. She flips out, assuming you have been trying to summon the Dark Lord with the hidden messages in your music. Right now, you have the opportunity of being a better Catholic than your mother and get out of this situation scot free. This is what you do.

Calmly, log on to ArtStor and look up Masaccio’s Pisa Altarpiece: Crucifixion of Peter. Then tell her the story behind the painting. St. Peter, one of Jesus’ twelve apostles and often regarded as the first pope, preached for the last years of his life in Rome. At this time, the Roman Empire was still thoroughly pagan and killed Christians on a regular basis. Peter ended up being one of these numerous early Christians to be martyred. The Romans, wanting Peter’s death to be as memorable as his Leader’s, ordered Peter to be nailed to a cross and crucified. Usually, criminals were merely tied to a cross and had to carry only half of the cross on their backs. Jesus and Peter were special in that they felt the nails punch through ligament and bone and carried the full weight of their crosses to the site of their crucifixions. But Peter had made mistakes in his life. His faith had wavered when he attempted to walk on water with his Lord. And, on the night of Jesus’ arrest, Peter denied being Jesus’ apostle three times in order to avoid being crucified along with his Messiah. Bearing his guilt on top of his cross, Peter announced he was not worthy of dying in the same way the Son of God had. The Romans obliged Peter’s wishes and crucified him upside down. Henceforth, the upside down cross is recognized as the symbol for St. Peter, not the devil.

Now you have convinced your Mother that, while being a fervent supporter of St. Peter, you are also a well rounded bible scholar. But then she asks why you were listening to Iron Maiden’s “Number of the Beast?”  Not having a convincing reason why, you decide to wow her with your art history knowledge instead. Masaccio constructs St. Peter entirely out of triangles. A strai8ht line runs through his arms. Trace diagonal lines up to the top of the cross. Triangle one accounted for. Then his torso up to his crotch, call it triangle two. These triangles point up, referring to St. Peter’s coming ascension into Heaven. Triangles three and four refer to another one of St. Peter’s roles in Christianity. Triangle three can be found between Peter’s legs and the top of the cross. This downward pressure of the third triangle draws attention to the final triangle, which is located underneath Peter’s arms. Draw two very narrow lines from St. Peter’s hands to his head. Triangle four reminds the viewer how St. Peter was the foundation of Christ’s church. Jesus called St. Peter the rock on which He would build His Church. St. Peter’s head, contained in the final triangle, appears to be the rock on which this painting was built on. This triangle holds the other triangles up, along with the people nailing St. Peter’s hands to the cross and the spectators. All their weight lies on Peter’s arms. Then the diagonal lines running parallel to Peter’s legs force the weight of the painting’s settings onto Peter. Mom, Masaccio paints St. Peter carrying way more than just a wooden cross on his back.

That’s all fine and dandy, she says. But why have you not stopped listening to your devil music? Cue Bruce Dickinson screaming, “666, the number of the beast, Hell and fire were spawned to be released!”