Know Your Chapeau: Minecraft hats

7:00 AM

George Stubbs, Turf with Jockey Up, 1765

The setting sun disappears over the horizon as I light the lanterns around the house. I go out to check on Jesus' stable to ensure that the zombies or skeleton archers will not disturb him during the night. Every night zombies just pound on the door and try to get in. After checking on Jesus, I walk back to my simple wooden plank shack before the nightly assaults, whether they be skeleton archer or zombie. The fire crackles in the furnace as the raw meat slowly transforms into my dinner to keep my hunger meter filled. Before I learned that raw meat could be cooked to restore my energy, I would venture out into the wilderness and slay herds of cow everyday just to sate my appetite. I hang my favorite baseball hat beside the collection of zombie heads, diamond pickaxes, and diamond swords and settle down for the night.
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During the night, I hear "THWAP" against the house repeatedly from skeleton archers futilely trying to break in. The zombies pounding on the doors prevents me from fully replenishing all my hearts each night, so in the morning my health bar is not filled to the brim as it should be. But as the sun rises, the noises recede back with the darkness and all is serene. Unfortunately daytime is the only opportunity available to work the fields without disturbance from the nightly hordes, and so I work it tirelessly so that I may finish each day's work before the sun sets.

I have recently developed this backpack that allows me to carry up to nine different items at once. With it, I have become a walking armory even while working the fields. I hold my diamond swords, pickaxes, hoes, shovels, and my bow and arrow. A short time ago I stumbled upon an enchanted bow that only requires me to carry one arrow at a time and yet can fire limitless arrows. I have thus named the bow: "The Infinity Bow" but am ignorant of its durability. Zombies beware.

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