Useless Lamentations and Rose-Colored Men

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By MEGAN GANNON

Useless Lamentations and Rose Colored Men 
The Counterproductive Resurrection 



Excerpt from back of the Album: 
In their first ever duo album, Useless Lamentations and Rose Colored Men have teamed up to bring you The Counterproductive Resurrection, an album bred in gospel tunes and head banging tracks. Stevie Urban and Francis Barefoot, the lead singers of the bands, describe their album as the heart and soul of nothingness, describing how no matter hard you try all of our actions in the end up being counterproductive...hence the album title. They explore their counterproductiveness through the rough tones and soft melodies of handcrafted banjos.

Rembrandt's The Abduction of Ganymede, struck the band’s fancy due to its dark undertones yet surprisingly optimistic outlook with the hawk’s successful capture. The bands see the child as a representation of humanity, and view themselves as the hawk, charged with drawing the voice from the screaming child. Useless Lamentations has opted to not take profits from the album’s launch, only wishing that listeners give them their soul instead. They mean this in the sense that fans send in a piece of hair, so the band can use it for their costumes for their upcoming world tour. In their final note about the album, both bands reiterate the importance of title, saying “Do not, do nothing, and let the hawk come down upon and carry you screaming soul away." 


Editor's Note: Students happened upon a cache of hidden records with cover art from the Baroque masters. They were charged to investigate the vinyls. The above are their findings. 

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